I can VIVIDLY remember sitting in the computer lab at Texas A&M University twenty years ago, crying with my fingers on a keyboard. I had a final paper due. Writing was so painfully hard for me that I couldn’t stand it. My degree is in Industrial Distribution, which is an engineering business degree, heavy on math, light on that writing stuff. Give me a math problem any day and I’m a happy girl. Math problems have definitive answers, black and white, right or wrong. I adore creativity but when it comes to schooling, writing has too much room for interpretation and it completely freaks me out. I ‘ve never thought of myself as a writer and never aspired to be one. Words on paper have historically been excruciatingly hard to muster. I’d rather write numbers or maybe draw a picture and talking to you in person would be the best option always.
I tell you all this because I want you to understand how I see myself. How I’ve seen myself for yeeeaarrrss… When God told me to start a blog a few year back I giggled, knowing this crazy idea MUST be from Him because there is NO WAY I would sign myself up for a writing gig. I mean I saved Writing 101 for the last semester of my senior year in college!!! That’s no joke. It’s no wonder I frequently doubt myself and my capability in this space.
Along the path God has been so kind to me. He gently nudges me toward the next step to take. He moved me to work on photography back before I even wrote my first post. He pushed me to reach out to other bloggers and form relationships. He encouraged me to attend conferences where I could learn and gain even more relationships. He’s told me when to say yes or no to opportunity and been patient when I didn’t listen and did things my way. Recently I felt His sovereign hand nudging me to work on growing my blog locally, in our hometown.
That is scary to my on many levels, mainly because there is a layer of comfort in not knowing everyone who reads this blog. Rarely do I tell people that I meet in person about the blog! Even Jesus was shunned in his own town and I’m nowhere close to filling his sandals! I knew this was the next step, but how did God want me to step out? He has revealed a few ways, but the first was our local newspaper, The Eagle.
I made a few phone calls, secured an appointment and went to pitch myself to the editor. f I’m being honest I wasn’t even sure what I was pitching, I was just stepping out in faith. As the editor and I chatted it was obvious to me that God’s favor was on the situation. Before I left the office they took a head shot and we discussed deadlines and print options.
When I got home I about had a nervous breakdown. My husband had to listen to me lament about this new found predicament…I was going to be a columnist for our newspaper! I was completely overjoyed and completely terrified all at the same time. I could hardly make sentences as I told my husband all the reasons this was completely crazy and I can’t believe the paper would let someone like me write an article for them. “I’m not a writer, I don’t know what I’m doing, I can’t do this! I don’t have time, what am I even going to write?” Sentence after sentence tumbled from my mouth as I sat astonished at the gift just given to me.
Many deep breaths later I landed, repeatedly, on one of my favorite verses and I rested in the peace that it brought.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
God and I had a heart to heart. If he wanted me to do this, then he would have to do it. That’s the only way it all makes sense. God sees us so differently than we see ourselves. He sees the one He created with infinite talent and possibility, because He is for us and He is in us who believe. We define ourselves with words and definitions that have limits and constraints and we do exactly that – limit and pigeonhole ourselves. We are better left allowing God to write our definition.
The words I write are not as poetic as Ann Voskamp or as funny as Jen Hatmaker, but they are mine and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are His. If you would have told me all those years ago as a sat with a keyboard bullying me that I would one day write in a newspaper I can promise you, I would have rolled my eyes and fallen on the ground laughing. But I’m not the girl I was back then, in more ways than one. Today I am a woman open to the possibility that maybe there is more to me than I give credit for, because I serve and love an abundant God who is limitless. His power, my weakness. I will never read my own words and feel prideful, It’s simply mot possible because my own words still scare me. But His words. Wow. I pray that my fingers can continue to be useful instruments as they hunt and peck on a keyboard. I pray that he will continue to fill me with creativity. I pray that he will help me manage my time effectively. I pray He will fill me. Most of all I pray that as I stumble through this journey, sharing it with you, you would see yourself through His eyes too. I pray that your fears would dissipate and your confidence would surge. His power, your weakness. You can do whatever it is He is calling you to right now. How about we pray for each other?
So it is with great joy and utter disbelief that I announce to you…I’m now a columnist for the Bryan-College Station Eagle Newspaper! I waited to share until the first article was pressed into black and white newsprint, scared they would wake up and figure out what they were doing! Please, don’t tell them how crazy nervous and unqualified I am. I’m counting on the one who is greater. So much for math problems and definitive answers, hope that editor has his red pen ready!
Congratulations Kim!! This is awesome. I can’t wait to continue to see how He is going to use your gifts and talents!
Thank you Kelly, I am super excited!
My husband and I are opening a small collectibles & Antiques shop in Greenville, Texas. I have felt that God is directing our path in this enterprise all along, but I haven’t been able to figure out how our shop can be used to glorify Him. I’m sure He will show me if I stay open to His direction. Meanwhile, I am so happy I found your blog. It is an inspiration to me. Thank you! Congratulations on becoming a columnist. It’s possible this is a path to encouraging many more in addition to your blog!
wow – that sounds so fun! I think anytime you marry your passion and your love for the Lord he is glorified. He will show you how to exude that through your store! Best of luck to you and I will say a prayer for wisdom in this area!
Oh my I feel like a proud mama with a child showing their work to me. I am reading this with tears of joy and elation for what God is showing you what HE can do thru you and you’re being obedient. I am so proud for you! ????????
Thank you Di – that means so much to me!! 🙂
This is so AWESOME!!! I just love seeing how God is using you and growing you and speaking through you. So proud of you, sweet friend! ????
Thank you friend 🙂
You are a true inspiration. Just what I needed to start my job search…allowing God to guide me with my talents. Can’t wait to read your article!
thank you – prayers for your hunt, He will make your path straight for sure!!!
Oh my goodness, Kim!! Is it weird that I feel so proud of you?? Like a sister that has hit the big time! I never would have thought to approach the newspaper. Congratulations, and you are more qualified than most for this part, you’re a DIY blogger! 🙂
lol Christy – I feel that way all the time for friends like you that I have made in this crazy blog world. It is so fun to work beside people and watch them succeed or reach dreams. There are so many inspiring, creative people that keep me chugging along and you are certainly one of them! Thank you for the love and YES DIY bloggers can do anything!
Great news remember God is always looking out for you May God Bless You
Always!!!
Congratulations! May God work strongly in you and through you.
Thank you a bunch!
Isn’t it just like God “To go above and beyond all we could ask or think”. Congratulations Kim!
I journaled a number of your points this morning… thank you for sharing with all of us. We are for you- keep up the great work!
He is a God of abundance and creativity beyond the scope of our little bitty minds for sure! Thank you so much
Congratulations! I am inspired how you have stepped out in your faith to follow this!
Thank you Gina!
O.M.Goodness!!!
So excited with you!! xo
Thanks friend 🙂 thanks for cheering me on always!
Kim,
I am leaping for joy for you! Amazing!
aww thank you, I leapt a little too after the panic attack subsided, lol!
I found you in the Eagle yesterday morning and read the article. I could hardly wait until after church to find you on line. I love your ideas and was pleasantly surprised to learn you are from Bryan–one of my favorite places.
Congratulations on your column and may God continue to bless you as you move forward.
Thank you neighbor! Bryan is such a great place I am excited to branch out a little more locally than I have been, so glad you are here! Thank you
Wow! What a great post! I am so glad you posted this today. God has worked in my life the same way as yours. I left my job of 25 years 1 1/2 years ago to go where he told me. My husband listened to the same words you said to your husband, while telling me he knew I could do this and he was confidant I would be fine. God was right, I got this new job now. And boy did this place need His guidance.
Listen to him and just go forth day by day. He will continue to guide you and keep you.
Thanks for posting!!!
Thank you for sharing and good for you to step out in faith. It is so important we share or stories to encourage others. He never leads us somewhere just to let us fall!
Congratulations!!! God is still working with me on conquering my fears….I love to bake, cook, love interior decorating….always have ideas….praying for you and I need prayers in the next chapter of my life…..so ready for change!! God is good!
Donna – I will lift you in prayer, I was just like you not to long ago, overwhelmed with what to do and how to move forward, but if you are on your knees he will lead you! Can’t wait to see what he brings you into!
This is so exciting!!! Congratulations!!!
thank you!!!! 🙂
Congrats & Gig Em!????????
Howdy!!!! thank you Debi
I am so happy for you – I know that God will use you, and boy, did I need to hear this today!!! I am teaching 2 workshops on Saturday to our ladies at a church retreat. If you could pray that His power would be made perfect in my weakness I would be SO grateful!!!
I love this math equation: HE > i
that is a great equation! Thanks for sharing and I will definitely pray for this weekend and His strength. I hope you can relax knowing that He will hold you hand and be your words!
So very excited for you! Your words here in your blog are so inspirational. Thank you for being here and sharing with us! CONGRATULATIONS on your huge leap! Blessings and smiles, Emilou
Thank you and I am so glad this was inspiring to you – Now I just have to do it!!! yikes!
I am so incredibly proud of you! You are such an inspiration! I’ll keep praying for you but we all know – He’s got this! 😉
Thanks sweet friend and you are so right, we just have to CONSTANTLY remind ourselves that He’s got it, or at least I do!
Wow! This is wonderful news! I know God will bless your faithfulness to His calling! You might remember that my husband went home to be with our Savior a year ago and I have told you on many occasions how your words come to me at just the right time in my grief journey. I had such a difficult (out of the blue) time last night. I was so overwhelmed with his loss, I felt like I was drowning. God sent me this verse, “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” Ps 30:5. True to His word, joy returned after a very tumultuous night.
I’ve been praying for God to give me wisdom in several areas of my life – to sell our happily-ever-after home (I DONOT want to but my 3 children want me too – conflict), to jump (for the first time ever) into the work force, to go back to teaching piano/voice? Like you, at God’s urging I recently started a blog. I also started a sampler guild. Those two things bring me joy but certainly don’t fill the void nor patch the hole in my heart. I needed your post today. This part…. “I pray that my fingers can continue to be useful instruments as they hunt and peck on a keyboard. I pray that he will continue to fill me with creativity. I pray that he will help me manage my time effectively. I pray He will fill me. Most of all I pray that as I stumble through this journey, sharing it with you, you would see yourself through His eyes too. I pray that your fears would dissipate and your confidence would surge. His power, your weakness. You can do whatever it is He is calling you to right now.”
Yes, let’s please pray for each other in these matters! Often I print out your words (His words) and put them in my journal so I can read them over and over. You are reaching so many folks with your words, Kim, and you bless my socks off just when I need it most. Loving you in the Lord! XO, Willa
Wow Willa, you have been through so much and have many decisions to make. I will pray for you. Thank you for sharing all that is going on in your life. I know God will give you discernment in these areas. I am so glad that you are blessed by this space, I can’t even explain how happy that makes me! Blessings friend
Thank you, Kim!
Kim I enjoy all your posts but especially the ones about your walk with God! Eight years ago I left a bad marriage which I had went into 13 years earlier. I was the single parent of 2 great boys, a home that was paid for and a good life I had worked hard to build. When I left the marriage I was 50, hadn’t worked in a while and was practically penniless with a self-esteem was shattered. I got a job at a nation-wide drug store (I’d always worked retail) but now at 58 and after knee-replacement and partially effective shoulder surgery the job is just too difficult. Feeling hopeless God has stepped in helping me to face my self-esteem issues that have been present since I was a child and I stepped out and applied for a new job! It would mean 3 months of learning something completely new(scary) but more money, weekends off, paid holidays and lots of paid time off! I believe I WILL get the job, not because I deserve it but simply a part of God caring for me! Sorry for the long post. Wanted to let you know what an inspiration your posts are and how God has used you in more ways than you know! Congrats on your column!
Thank You Tammie and I pray you get that job. It is always so scary to learn something new, but we have to press on don’t we!? You have already proved you are a women of determination and faith, so I have no doubt you are more than capable of this new adventure. Best of luck to you, let me know how it goes!
God is the greatest friend we have, I know he will empower anyone who is willing and you are such a sweet person. His light shines through you. Congratulations for taking that leap to be useful for his purpose.
Thank you Marlene and YES he will use anyone, thank goodness because my resume qualifies me NONE!
Many times we limit what we do, because of our own insecurities, or because someone else has influenced us in the past, giving us the idea we aren’t “good” at a particular skill. Our God, however is not limited by anything, and has gifted you with an ear to hear Him whisper encouragement to you.
As a senior citizen, He urged me to begin painting, and He has enabled me to have my own sign-painting business, sell my art at vendor fairs, and on a website for creatives. In that process He has brought many precious people into my life, and richly blessed me with joy-filled moments as I create and paint. I never felt able to do this, and still am so surprised when my customers are so complimentary and actually collect my pieces! All glory goes to Him who is not limited by my fear, insecurity, or my ideas of my skill set.
Enjoy this beautiful time, listen to His Words of encouragement to you, and let the words flow. He will give you everything you need.
Thank you for your sweet encouragement, I would love to see the pieces you paint! What a special gift. I just love how God allows us to serve him through the things we love and then he makes it a blessing for us. It’s amazing!
So proud of you! Thank you for sharing your gift with our city!!
Thank you sweet friend…for all your support!!!
One of our chaplains used to say,”God draws straight with our crooked lines.” He’s got lots to work with in you my friend! Is there anyway to get a copy of the words without the pictures? I would love to have this in article/PDF form!
thank you and yes He sees things so differently than us! I can work on the words for you
I am so excited for you Kim!! And I know you will do great 🙂
Thanks Melanie, it’s a humbling experience for sure
Kim, God Bless You! What a wonderful way to share your talents and what a journey you have been on. I have been struggling with the direction my blog and my life should take as of late and you remind me to turn to prayer and God for guidance.
You were such a great inspiration for me on this trip – you were so joy filled it was contagious, I appreciated it so much. Hope you find your footing and head in the direction God points, blessed by you!
Thanks for the encouragement. I was just asked to become a volunteer for our local Historic Society and I feel so inadequate. Perfect timing to read your blog………………..
he doesn’t call the equipped he equips the called, you will be fabulous!